Being a woman is not a piece of cake. A kingdom without a woman is nothing but a shaggy-dog story. Being a woman is not easy. It is a voyage of self-discovery and acquiring the knowledge to love yourself for who you are.
When we talk about a woman, the first and foremost thing that strikes our minds is a perfect maidan for responsibilities. She must be flawless in all aspects of life. She must be alluring, enchanting, charismatic, smart, and confident. Women also have to deal with the social pressure of faultlessness and exemplariness.
The truth is that society has made it tremendously hard to be a woman. Society imposes certain rules on a woman—how she should look, how she should act, and what her priorities should be. Everyone wants to mold her according to their own desires and wishes, but no one is ready to accept her as she is, with all her impurities and imperfections.
A mother skips her meals so her children can eat. A young girl walks home alone at night, wary of every shadow. A woman smiles politely while enduring comments she never asked for.
Man is not the only one who has mastered the art of suffocating girls; women have learned this art too. You hardly hear a woman saying she is free and can do whatever she wants, because in our norms, only women bring disgrace, shame, and ill repute to the family.
In our culture, a man is perfect with all his imperfections. It seems acceptable if he is a swindler, scammer, playboy, criminal, gambler, violent, or even a murderer. Yet he expects a sacred soul who neither speaks nor is seen by any creature.
We are told what to wear. We are told how to act. We are told when to speak. We are told to be perfect. A man can be reckless and still be respected. A woman laughs, and she is judged. A woman cries, and she is shamed. Who decides what a woman should be? Who gave them the right to define her life? Why do only women carry the shame?
I am not a feminist, but I believe in equality. I want to be taken seriously for my goals, achievements, and dreams. It is my right not to be harassed or stared at. I wish to walk alone in the streets without cheeky, annoying comments.
I want to wear, eat, behave, smile, laugh, and cry according to my own desire. I want to live the way I am.
I am not asking for freedom; I am claiming what was always mine. And I will not apologize for it.
Being a woman is like walking on glass barefoot—every step judged, every word measured. Yet we continue, unbroken, daring, and alive.
We do not fear men. We fear the power we gave them. I am not here to fit your mold. I am here to live my truth.
I will live my life, on my terms, with my dignity intact.
Fizza Qaisar is a journalist who writes about social issues and human struggles.
